We will store your face in a box


The approximate size of your face

Must be able to fit into this box

You must contact Tarzan if it is too large

We will not issue assassins

To kill you.

Our disposal policy is:

Please kill yourself

When we are satisfied you are dead

We will store your face in a box

No face will be stored without a review date

Review date must be written on your forehead

Old worn faces must not be used

The management reserves the right to refuse faces

It deems socially unacceptable

Thank you for your time.


Keep it light


The tattooed shank is in the news again

While Hyena man laughs,

and the echoes are reflected,

through the happy streets.


Narcissus kisses the mirror,

and the wind sounds like one long sigh into the night.


There is a knock at the door

But there is no door.


Men with umbrellas fall from the sky

Landing on the smiling face of Dick Turpin.


But in the end

‘Keep it light’


Like when nature reverses the night.

Tomorrow you melt with the snow


You could be, if you ever tried, become much more than now

But today you rain with tears.

I never did go back to the start, I could not find it

But tomorrow you melt with the snow.


Failure cannot hurt you,

Still you fear it.

Love will hurt you,

Still you embrace the stranger who will destroy you in the end.

Their empty loving face, a mirror of illusion.


Take me to your dreams,

I wonder if forever remains the same?

Forgotten things, also forget themselves,

I’ll remember your face


Even when you have forgotten everything.





I was here before you were born

I will be here long after you have gone

I am your friends and the stranger in the street

I am everyone you will ever meet

I am all things that will ever be

I am you as you are me

I will change but never fade away

No need for sorrow at the end of every passing day

I am you as you are me

I am Eternity



Film Review from a surrealist


‘It’s like a scene from a comedy’

A tragic comedy

Who laughs at friendship?

No more rainy days was the subtext

We’ll all be happy, if only we could

Here I am, its unreal

Outspoken guilty mother, on the run

From her magical baby, it’s thought-provoking stuff

Who can imagine anything more?

Fast forward to the last words of her life, but

Iconic father figure has more on his mind

‘Pretty weird, creepy things’

All stored in a 1980’s bag

‘If I asked you six months ago – what would you tell me?’ he quotes often

There is an unnaturally violate soundtrack, which rings out

who hears everything?

Nobody, but technologically advanced dogs

The voices of the dogs and cats, are in Scottish accents

they command respect in every scene

The cat looked like someone unstable

The dog, I respected like I would respect a leopard.

But then the outfits just screamed:

‘Sexual Predator!’

We were all trying to understand it

Let me tell you

Despite everything – It was an enjoyable film.




Lights, Camera, Action!


You can’t restart it

that’s the real

problem with life

When it comes to the

Lights, Camera, Action!


What if you

fluff your lines?

I mean who’s the

director anyway?

I know us

gents are always

looking for a

leading lady

But some

prefer a leading man

Some of the

things we say

Well who writes

this stuff?

Very few

of us get the

acclaim we deserve

Often being

a villain is

more fun

Still when

the credits roll

Was there

anyone left

to shed a tear?